July 1 & 2--Hello Again

July 1

"I AM LIFE AND LIGHT IN ABUNDANCE.
As you spend time 'soaking' in My Presence, you are energized and lightened. Through communicating with Me, your burdens are transferred to My strong shoulders. By gazing at Me, you gain My perspective on your life. This time alone with Me is essential for unscrambling your thoughts and smoothing out the day before you.

Be willing to fight for this precious time with me. Opposition comes in many forms: your own desire to linger in bed; the evil one's determination to distract you from Me; the pressure of family, friends, and your own inner critic to spend your time more productively. As you grow in your desire to please me above all else, you gain strength to resist these opponents. delight yourself in Me, for I am the deepest Desire of your heart."

Psalm 48:9; Deuteronomy 33:12; Psalm 37:4

July 2

"LET ME SHOW YOU My way for you this day. I guide you continually, so you can relax and enjoy My Presence in the present. Living well is both a discipline and an art. Concentrate on staying close to Me, the divine Artist. Discipline your thoughts to trust Me as I work My ways in your life. Pray about everything; then, leave outcomes up to Me. Do not fear My will, for through it I accomplish what is best for you. Take a deep breath and dive into the depths of absolute trust in Me. Underneath are the everlasting arms!"

 Psalm 5:2-3; Deuteronomy 33:27
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Well, that struck a chord deep within me. It's like I was supposed to read that, to remember, to feel guilty for neglecting my Lord; but, most importantly, to kick me back on track. I got lost in all the commotion of daily life, struggles, confusion, financial issues, life frustrations...everything!

Reading today's devotion gave me the idea to start a blog based on this book.

Here is why:

The month of June 2011 was incredibly hard for me, but the downward spiral seemed to have started a month earlier. In the beginning of May, my husband bought me a bunny for my 25th birthday. He was the cutest darn thing and we both fell in love with the little creature only to have him pass away (assuming of heart-attack as they are prone to) three days later. We were devastated.

The weeks following, we had an absolutely wonderful time with our friends from Canada and Chicago, IL, who came down to be part of my husband and I's wedding ceremony. We'd been married since July 23 of 2010, but never had the bigger ceremony that included friends and family. Anyway, we enjoyed ourselves on "our" day with our friends and family.

About two weeks later, I was an a car accident. I was rear-ended rather hard (but not hospitalized, Thank God!) and pushed into the vehicle in front of me. Luckily we have very good insurance and I was in our 3500 Dodge diesel, but there was still substantial damage done to our truck. Still having to pay a rather good chunk as our deductible, it really tightened our finances--and then one thing after another crept up on us financially at the same time. My cat, that I had for 6 (almost 7--since he was a kitten) years, was killed by coyotes in our neighborhood. Completely devastated me. Then more financial crop ups.

It's been a frustrating, worrisome mess and my husband and I have been feeling so completely over-whelmed. Only in these situations do we remember what we lost sight of. The most important thing. We forgot to have Faith in God.

God has always taken care of us. Previously, when finances had gotten tight or random things would pop up, I would hand over that worry to God for him to take off our plate. And He DID! Why did I lose sight of that in the first place? Why did I forget to hand Him my worries like I had so easily done before? I got consumed by the world. Eaten up whole, lost, and left with negative feelings and emotions. He'd always taken care of us before... "he of so little faith." It's not that I didn't have Faith, I had just forgotten. It breaks my heart to know that and I feel so ashamed. But... I know He still loves me and still wants to take our worries and burdens from us so He can handle it. I have to remind myself and be firm with myself to not lose faith, not to lose sight of Him, and to remember: HE is there for US. There for us to hand over our worldly worries. There to comfort us in the down-time in our lives, to remind us that He is the provider of all and if we stay within His light and presence, he will continue to provide all that we will ever need.

I finally picked up my Jesus Calling book, that has been sitting collecting dust on my computer desk since April 22, 2011. That is the last day I opened it and it makes sense that the downward spiral started just shortly after that. Some say, it's a coincidence. But no, it's not.

Thank you for letting me share this and get this "off" of my chest.. life can be a struggle, but I believe with God and Jesus in your heart, the struggle is short-lived and the reward is much much greater in the end.